This is a response to this Tumblr’s call for submissions, as brought to my attention by Heather from this Jezebel post.
The New York Times Book Review (like so many book reviews) made a very gendered “mistake.” As Jezebel so succinctly put it: “The New York Times Book Review’s How-To Issue lists eight pieces on its cover, two of which are written by women. And guess what they’re about? Raising children and cooking.” Molly Templeton, creator of the Tumblr, points out that of course “There is nothing wrong with cooking and raising children; there are lots of things right and wonderful with these pursuits. They are also, as I’m sure I don’t need to tell you, traditionally female tasks.” She thus asks women to write their own how-to pieces and submit them. Before I dive into my piece, consider this a formal call for you to do the same, should you feel so inclined. You can submit them to us first (fuddledfeminists@gmail.com) and send the link to her, or send it right to her if you’d rather. Either way, I’d love to read it. I can’t think of a woman I know who doesn’t know how to do something amazing amazingly well.
So here it is:
How to Date Yourself.
1. Before you even try asking yourself out, it helps if you like yourself. You and yourself will have to spend a lot of time together, so if you don’t like yourself, try to fix that ASAP. Do you find yourself boring? Always thinking about the same old thing? Nothing to do in your free time? Consider yourself a dull work drone with nothing more satisfying waiting for you at the end of the day than a glass of wine? Don’t be discouraged. Mostly, you just need to be not-so-hard on yourself and maybe give yourself a little makeover—no, silly, not the women’s magazine sort. This makeover involves asking yourself what you like to do, what makes you happy, what you might like to try, and then giving yourself more of it. Do you like to paint? Do you like to go rock climbing? Do enjoy researching thermodynamics? Next try to think about the other things you already like about yourself. Once you start looking at yourself in terms of positives rather than negatives, you’ll start to realize all the reasons you want to go out with yourself. Time to start dating.
